A Different Path

Brazil and I are no longer together. After much fasting and prayer I realized that there is a different path for me right now. It's hard. Brazil and I have an extensive past together-- full of memories and moments that I wouldn't trade for the world. But for some reason we aren't supposed to be together right now.

So many doors have been opened for both of us that we never planned. He managed to get a scholarship to "chosen university" for Spring semester (I don't know if he realizes how significant that is... they RARELY give scholarships for Spring.. they are usually given in the Fall) and this isn't any scholarship.. it's one doing graphic design for the school, which is his major. So not only does he get all his tuition covered but he will build his portfolio at the same time. This is only one of the blessing that have come into his life as of late, but the Lord has a plan for him and he is opening doors for him.

As for me... Everyone always told me to have a plan B. I did--sort of. I swear on my life that I thought we'd be together, so I never REALLY gave plan B a thought, but here I am a month and a half from graduation (I'm graduating early) and I had no real direction at all. No preference for school, no "declared" major, etc. But after a series of intense prayer, pondering, & blessings I feel like I'll find myself at the Y this coming Fall and I'll possibly move to that general area come January... Talk about wrench in the gears.. Whether I like it or not I am a small town girl. I have always lived in smaller towns, but come January I'll be in total culture shock as I adapt to life in the big city (it's not that big.. but for me it is!).

I have taken the biggest leap of faith of my life so far. Brazil is everything that I've known for the last 4 years of my life. And even though our hearts are broken, I know that the Lord has a plan for both of us. There are still lessons to be learned and experiences to be had. And life would be unfair if happiness wasn't attainable.. but I know that together or separate we can both obtain happiness if we live our lives the way that we should. I know that I have made the hardest decision of my life but I also know that it was the correct decision for me.

"Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same."

-The Fray