Thanks!

Mostly I just want to say thank you to everyone that reads. These last weeks have been crazy and it's been fun to post about all of the happenings, but mostly I'm grateful for all of the people reading that have been showing me support and encouragement.. whether i know you or not- or whether or not you comment... I'm grateful all the same. If you keep reading then I'll keep trying to live an interesting enough life to post about it ;) 

Loves-

He's Back!

Brazil is home. WEIRD! ha ha here's the scoop:

So after taking the hardest test of my life.. I threw all of my stuff into a suitcase and got out of town ASAP. When I got to Hometown Kla came over and I hurriedly got ready! Then there was a knock at the door and Brazil's mom was there with the letter. I opened it and bawled. It basically expressed his love for his mission and the sacred two years that it was. It was SOOO good! so at that point I was a wreck!

Kla took a picture of my right before we left with the letter in my hand.

His name tag was used as a paper clip..

Then we took a pic in the car!

please note that my face is quite red and I'm STILL teary eyed! Son of a gun!

Then we headed to his house. The Head Nurse told us that the interview shouldn't take very long and right after she dropped off the letter she was going to go and pick him up.. so we hurried over there asap! but when we got there no one was home.. so I decided to sit on the porch and wait--

Well time passed and Dalton ( another close friend ) showed up and he waited with us.

25 minutes went by and i got a call from the Head Nurse stating that the interview only took about 10 minutes, but Brazil had seen a soccer buddy from high school at the stake center and decided to chat... for forever! Well finally he came...

Me standing on the porch as they drove in--

Then we HUGGED!

this pic didn't turn out very bright so i just messed with the exposure-- that 's why it looks a little funny but at least you can see us!

This next picture needs explaining.. so after we hugged for probably 3 minutes- Kla took a pic

of us and guess what Brazil did.... HE WENT TO DO A THUMBS UP!.. remember this post about the thumbs up?? So I smacked his hand down and was like NO MORE THUMBS UPS! He laughed and said "AH! it's such a bad habit!!" lol

then we were all laughing when she took the picture... which is probably the reason why I look ridiculous!

After that we all went inside and chatted! It was fun to listen to him :)

Well that's pretty much the story! We hung out that night and then I went over to visit him the next morning and helped him unpack and stuff.. I also gave him his birthday present which is two tickets to the MAYDAY PARADE concert next month! We're both STOKED! and we are also going to a college football game and General Conference next weekend :) good stuff!

His Last Day and The Wrap Up

It's funny because I hadn't even read the Head Nurse's post and last night I was thinking the same thing.

Brazil will leave Brazil at about 7pm and yesterday I found myself thinking about him and praying for him a lot. I'm not jealous of him right now. I can't imagine being torn between the home you came from and the home you've created. He has a great life. He has an amazing family that loves him and is thoroughly anticipating his return. He has great friends that can't wait to see him. He has many talents that will take him far in life.. He has a lot to look forward to, but in exchange he leaves his beloved Brazil. He leaves the people he has served with all of his heart and sole. He will cease to use his Portuguese on a daily basis (believe it or not it is one of his HUGE concerns.. "I'm going to have an accent when I come back! I worked to hard to get rid of it..." ha ha). I'm just sad for him. Last night I was talking to my Brother (he's my brother in law but to me he's blood) and he said so what do you think he's doing right now?? and I said well it's like 2 am there and he's probably awake... He doesn't sleep very well anyway, but when he has a lot on his mind it's worse. I felt for him..

Today he says goodbye... but the good news is that it's not goodbye for good-- but goodbye for now. He'll be back I have no doubt :) But until he is on that plane and the reality sets in that he's coming home, I think it's going to be a rough couple hours.

What's in store for tomorrow??

Well the rest of the night tonight I'm studying for two tests that I have tomorrow-- bad timing I know! The first test is in Group Communication early and then I have to go to my history class after that. Biology is the other test that I have.. it's going to be rough.. but I can take that any time tomorrow. So once I'm out of History I will be studying for the next 3 hours and I'll take my biology test sometime later that afternoon.

Meanwhile- Brazil flies in at 11 :) His immediate and extended family will enjoy his presence for the next couple hours and then they'll drive back to "Hometown"

After Biology I'm off to Hometown!! and Kla will be with me every step of the way (THANKS GIRL! You're the best!) she's going to come to my house and hang out with me while I attempt to remain conscious. Brazil has specified that he is bringing home a letter for me-- I need to get it and read it before I see him... so there is just a touch of mystery to tomorrow!! So I get the letter.. read it.. shower.. primp.. head to his house and plan to be there before he gets back from the church so that I can give him the biggest hug in HISTORY immediately after he is released :) --

After that I plan to just chill at his house with his family and listen to all his stories and ya! The only thing I plan on doing tomorrow-- besides stare at him-- is give him his birthday present!!!!

Wish me luck! I dunno if I'm going to post tomorrow or not... I might have Kla take a picture of me and we'll post it asap before I leave so that you all can all bask in my moment with me ha ha CRAZY!

These have been some of the most intense years of my life. I have learned and grown more than I could've imagined. I am eternally grateful for it. And Brazil has probably learned and grown even more than I have. The test is whether we've grown in a way that will allow us to be together or whether we have grown to be separate people. It's a risk... but either way I wouldn't change my decision to wait for a minute... I loved watching someone I care about so deeply become even more remarkable. I loved to watch him overcome struggles, triumph over difficulties, and -of course- bring souls unto Christ. I am blessed to have such an amazing person be a part of my life--

dear brazil

STOP

it's been forever

STOP

think we could rendezvous tomorrow night

STOP

because I'm SO over this pen and paper crap

STOP

talk to you then

STOP

loves--

{What I'm doing to prepare}

Mentally

Well there is not much to mentally prepare myself for... I know he's probably going to be a little bit strange, but that's how it is with all missionaries! The only other thing that I need to prepare for is the possibility of rejection-- but I'm not too worried about that. My new theory is that I wish that I was still apprehensive and scared because at least then time went a little faster... Now that I'm looking forward to it it's going to be the LONGEST 5 DAYS EVER!

Physically

Well the Head Nurse told me that her sister lost 5 lbs. the week that her mish came home... I wish that was true for me! ha ha I had all these goals this summer to be able to fit into some of the clothes that I fit into before he left--- not so much. I think I've gained a couple pounds since summer.. but what can you do??! Other than that I've been using my whitening strips ever day this week and my eyebrows are super nasty right now [not that that's in anyway different than normal] but I'll pluck them Monday so they'll be nice and pretty! I'm still debating on what to wear.. That could be a toughy.

Spiritually

Well this week I have caught up on my journal.. FINALLY! I practically skipped summer [not that I did anything worth writing.. so it's no big deal].. but I am caught up! I've also been reading morning and night and doing a morning devotional with me, myself, and I. There's nothing like singing acappella in your room right when you wake up. Let's just say I lower the song at least an octave! But I'm trying my hardest to have the spirit mostly so that I can just get through the week. Because the hardest thing is just STAYING FOCUSED! So this has been a factor in reducing that attention deficit... Have I ever told you that I'm self diagnosed A.D.D.? I really think I am.. but anyways---

and that is the update!

He's the Reason Why I STILL .....

1- Listen to the BEST music ever!

My favorite---------His favorite

2-Love Macintosh

3-Look at the stars

4-Smile at the smell of hockey stench [I smile right before I dry heave]

**Brazil right after a hockey game**

5- Prefer driving a standard.. meet his car Fergie

**updated thanks to the Head Nurse**

6- ALWAYS make a wish at 11:11

7- Love to wear my ADIDAS

8- Got out of my comfort zone

9- Met some of the my best friends

**no worries it's guarana**

10- know "He Loves Me"!!

--These Last Weeks--

I've been panicked. Over the course of the last month- at the mention of Brazil's name- my stomach would turn and heart would race... in a bad way. It wasn't because I was excited and stoked to see him, but because I was nervous and apprehensive. I would have been ever so grateful to get a call from his mom that said that he had extended and wouldn't be home for another couple weeks. I felt like I was unprepared and I was scared. I have a lot going on lately with school (aka biology), ambassadors, institute council, work, my social life, (when I have the time for one) and Brazil. There are so many question marks.. when he gets released am I his girlfriend right then?? Do I want to attach that fast? But I don't want to wait too long!! What is he thinking? What's it like to have a boyfriend?? because I don't remember! What if "it's" not there anymore? How would I deal? but what if it is there? Long distance relationship and the thought of marriage looming somewhere in the near future.. BAH! I was at the brink of what I could handle last week.

I was on the phone with Brazil's mom and she was giving me the tentative schedule for the day he got home. She told me he'd be released at 7:2opm and yada yada yada. After that conversation everything changed. I have no idea why, but I just realized that no matter how hard I drag my feet and complain about how busy that week is going to be (by the way the week he comes home is probably the busiest week of my whole semester-- of course!) and no matter how unprepared I am mentally, spiritually, and physically the reality is that he is coming home. HE IS COMING HOME! and I've just got to roll with the punches! Lately when people ask.. it's a positive feeling that I get. I'm excited. I want to see him. I want to give him a huge hug and then the two of us will take it day by day after that because there is no use in worrying about what I don't know.. right??!

So this week I'm probably going to post a little more often than usual and hopefully you'll check often to keep updated!

9 days --- and counting ;)